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Unregistered(d) |
Wedding Rings |
Lead | |
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I'm not sure if this is the proper place to begin this discussion but I guess it's a start. Im fairly new in the Lord and I was wondering about a few things. Primarily standards and how they are set. I know that some of them are biblically based and some are based on your pastor. Where do wedding rings fall in all of this. I've visited several churchs that appear to have the same beliefs as we do but when it comes to things like television, movies, veils cut/uncut hair, and wedding rings everyone seems to be doing something different. Is there anyone out there who could shed some light on the subject whether it be a book, preaching tape or just your own insight. It would be much appreciated.
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coffeeplease |
Re: Wedding Rings | ||
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Well Deni this just happens to be a subject that is on a lot of married couples minds with in the AC church. As a "tradition" couples do not wear wedding bands. Why this is I have no idea. I was just told that and didn't have a problem with it until I became very active with in the community. I struggled with it for some time and just couldn't find in the Bible and with talking to God that wearing a wedding band was wrong. Basically my two options were, offend people in the community who are looking to me as Christian women or offend my fellow church members? When I weighed my options I found that the church members really didn't have much to base the offense on. I was not walking outside of scriptures and I certainly wasn't sinning in that respect. There are NO scriptural references that say not to wear a wedding band. There are a few references about gold, both in a positive and warning sort of way. It is one of those times when we might feel slightly irked by a liberty someone may be taking, but we must always check ourselves against scripture and take our own intentions for feeling the offense before the Lord.
Many of these issues are done in the sense of unity within the church. I guess the next question is.... Are these issues really what keeps us unified? Are we glorifying God with these issues or does it just make us feel more whole as a church. (That is not bad) Paul's references to some of these issues were not given to the church as a whole, but to individual congregation if we can call them that. Each letter was to a different church dealing with things within that church. The only way we are truly united is by our common salvation given to us in a state of Grace. True, we further the body of Christ in all that we say and do (works), but bear in mind that good works comes from under Faith and Grace. Once we have Faith, our works will multiply. So to return to your question.you are going to be hard pressed to find many answers within books outside of the Bible.and some just aren't there. Go to God, He will give you all you need to know. I do wear a wedding band and am a member of the Apostolic Christian Church. This is my conviction, but I certainly do not press this conviction on anyone else. If wear a band makes you uneasy, first check your reasons for not (I don't want anyone to see me or it is not an issue with me, etc.) Dont!!! But if you are headed to the OB for the next 9 months without a wedding band and you feel funny..search it out, God may give you a surprizing answer or not. Please don't let the "issue" of "we don't wear rings" stand in your way. One last note, having said all of this, because you and God may have settled some of these issues between you, knowing that offenses could be makedo be respectful with a loving attitude. There really is no reason to throw what you may feel comfortable with in the face of those who may not. God Bless CoffeePlease "Coffee is prepared in such a way that it makes those who drink it witty: at least there is not a single soul who, on quitting the house, does not believe himself four times wittier that when he entered it." --Charles de Secondat Montesquieu |
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Unregistered(d) |
Re: Wedding Rings | ||
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That really is comforting to hear. For some time I have been struggling with this. I do not feel that there is anything wrong with wearing my wedding ring and have no personal convictions about it. Every time that I asked other saints and older (wiser) sisters in the church none of them could provide me any scriptural backing. I did search other books and most of them said things that did not appear to be wrong. I also felt very alone and at times like the odd ball because I was willing to search this out where others just accepted what they were told. I think my asking them questions just frustrated them and as a result there comments weren't always nice. They would say things like obedience is better than sacrifice or if God took it from the children of Isreal why would it be okay for us. I always thought it was because they worshiped it. Even though I do not push what I believe on to those that are around me I feel like I am influencing them because since I've been wearing my ring now all of a sudden others are wearing theres also. I do not want to cause discord and I love my pastor and do not want him to think that I am bucking his authority.
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Unregistered(d) |
Re: Wedding Rings | ||
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I'm not trying to intrude or even convince you that you are wrong. I have been an apostolic for five years now and had clue about anything a/p before then.
This is the scripture that I go by for this issue~ 1 Timothy 2:9-10 In a like manner also, that women adorn thimselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness, and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works. This scripture shows Clearly that we as holy children of God should indeed Not wear Gold, pearls or costly array. In the wearing of a wedding ring, the person does most if not all of these things. The reason for the not wearing braided hair is because the women of those says wore gold braided into their hair to bring more attention to themselves. I have watched pentecostal churches that avoid this scripture in the bible and let their men and women start wearing wedding bands. Then it's ok to wear class rings, then it's ok to wear birthstone rings, and it's ok to wera promise rings and it's ok to wear....do you get the picture. I live in the South. When I go somewhere and people see that i do not wear a ring all they have to do is look at the rest of what I have on and they understand. Most pentecostal/apostolic people do not wear jewelry down here and it is a known fact. They don't assume we are unwed. We shouldn't bow down to societies standards of what should be. If you wear a wedding band you wear it for other people to look at. You bring glory to yourself and not to God. The devil doesn't convict you of wrong things. God does. Should we wait for the conviction or just simply follow the scripture that he gives us in the first place? Sorry this was so long. |
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coffeeplease |
Re: Wedding Rings | ||
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We shouldn't bow down to societies standards of what should be. If you wear a wedding band you wear it for other people to look at. You bring glory to yourself and not to God.
First of all, Welcome to the women's discussion. It is a pleasure to have you join us. Regarding the above statement......my wedding band is not for others to look at, it is simple and certainly no cost. we should be careful to make judgements not knowing the other's hearts. I am sure you did not intent to come across this way The devil doesn't convict you of wrong things. God does. Should we wait for the conviction or just simply follow the scripture that he gives us in the first place God is silent of the issue of the wedding band. Nothing is mentioned of it in the new testiment. There is references of gold,(not wedding band) but let's be careful to not form conclusions that are not there. If the elder body based the tradition of no wedding bands on this verse, it is a very weak reference as comparative to others (issues) throughout scripture that have deeper value that are overlooked. This is the reason I had to search my heart and talk to God about my convictions on it. One thing we all need to remember on this board is that we are all going to have different convictions. I am not pressing you to wear a band, and hopefully you wouldn't expect me to not, according to your convictions. God Bless........ |
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coffeeplease |
to jessishere | ||
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I will remove this when I know you have seen it....just wanted to let you know that we are not a pentacostal faith. You are more than welcomed to continue posting here, but just wanted to give you a heads up.
Coffeeplease |
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coffeeplease |
rings | ||
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Cut and pasted from main forum...
Personally, I think if a ring is something symbolic (which I believe it is) you should wear it accordingly...what I mean is, if the absence of a ring is giving people the wrong impression (such as you are living in sin) I would recommend that you wear one when in the presence of such a group--- and if it offends the people in your church, simply don't wear it to church! If I'm not mistaken, rings can be easily put on and removed can they not? I think the object here is, that we try not to be a stumbling block to others. |
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walkbyfaith |
Other Jewelry | ||
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I completly agree with the above statement. But I think that we should be really careful when we start wearing wedding rings. Other churches used to go by the same standards as ours and not wear rings or other jewelry. When they permitted members to wear wedding rings, pretty soon the people started wearing other jewelry also. So from other churches' histories I think we need to keep an eye on ourselves if we chose to wear a wedding band.
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KeepItSimple |
too many extremes | ||
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plain and simple....if a church is going to let people wear wedding bands....i see no reason why it can't be kept strictly wedding bands and forget about all other jewelry. It's like this...some musical instruments are not proper for church use, so the church decides to ban instruments completely...that i think is so wrong.....why can't we just draw a line between what's proper and what's not, instead of going to all these extremes????
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Unregistered(d) |
wedding band | ||
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To each his own.....The wedding band is a symbol of love and embodies a perfect circle of commitment between two people and God. Fellow church members , if it offends them should just rely on the "judge not lest ye be" rule. and keep to themselves.
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Striving4Truth |
Re: wedding band | ||
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Coffeeplease! Hey there girl..I've missed you. I haven't been on posting and reading in a while....kids and life just got really busy. Anyhow, I have a question. When you decided to wear a wedding band (and I understand that your hubby does not-or is thinking about it)....did anyone in your church give you a problem or have a concern about it? Or do they even know?
Curious S4T |
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coffeeplease |
Re: wedding band | ||
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Hey! to you too. I am been extremely busy also. I don't think it is going to slow down.
Most people know that I wear a wedding ring, but nobody has said anything to me. If push came to shove, me always the fighter, I can't imagine it would really bother them being there is no basis for it in the bible. I do not wear it to church or church functions. I think that would put some people over the edge and I want to remain respectful. |
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alwaystriving |
Re: wedding band | ||
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About wedding rings......I took vows in front of man and GOD to bind myself to my husband. Unfortunately all of mankind was not there to see this vow made. When I am in public every person who sees me will know that I have made this vow....because of my wedding ring. I feel a wedding ring stops a lot of confusion and potential sin.
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Unregistered(d) |
wedding rings | ||
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Wedding rings:
I've had an elder tell me another reason that has not been mentioned. The wedding band started from pagan tradition (I myself haven't proven or researched this, I'm just happy to not deal with the expense) - superstition used to dictate that the central vein in one's body flowed through the marriage finger, and when you became married you put the band on to protect you - this sounds out there but it was what I was told. This was always seen as a pagan belief. Anyone else heard anything similar? |
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Unregistered(d) |
Marriage Rings a Symbol of the Covenant | ||
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This post addresses the "pagan tradition" question.
Many people know that marriage is a convenant. Few americans, in particular, have a true concept of the strength of covenant. Covenants have been around since sin entered the world. You can see the first covenant of God with man when God makes one with Cain. He covenanted with Cain to protect him, though people would want to kill him. Later, we see God cutting the covenant with Abraham. In God's covenant with Abraham we see first what became the common practice for cutting the covenant - blood and scar. Abraham was circumcised as a symbol of the covenant. It was his constant reminder, every day, of the covenant between he and God. Every male of that covenant until Jesus was cut in the same way - the symbol of their covenant. Now we have a new covenant that Paul says does not require the cut, as the cut is in our hearts. From then until now, when a covenant is made, the two parties will select each a representative who will have his hand, or arm cut and then made to fester so that it scars. That scar forever becomes the reminder of the covenant that was made on that day in the blood of the two representatives, and is binding force of death. These covenants were carried out by pagans, for the most part, who to this day have an understanding of covenant. In times past (and NOT in America) when the covenant of marriage was made, the finger we now wear the ring on was physically branded and made to scar so that anyone who saw it would know that these two were in covenant. It was a lifetime reminder to all (including the one who wore it) that the covenant was in force. The scar was made on what we know today as the "ring finger" because medical philosophers of the time believed that this finger had a nerve that went to the heart of the nervous system, and covenants were designed to affect the heart - to be central to all actions. It was symbolic! Now in America, and a lot of the "civilized world" we have lost the strength of the meaning of covenants. Promises were made to be broken. Covenants are on paper and we remove them with more paper. They are largely meaningless to us. The wedding ring, however, still remains from this tradition. It is worn on the ring finger in leiu of scarring the flesh, yet still displayed as a symbol of the covenant made before God and man. God looks on the heart. He sees one flesh. Man sees what's on the finger. He sees one flesh. So, in summary, the wedding ring is a ring and placed on the ring finger because of tradition. But the symbol of the covenant and the covenant itself is brought about by God, Himself. Me, I'll wear the ring no problem. I don't adorn myself with it. My husband adorned me with it. |
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Unregistered(d) |
Wedding Band | ||
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First of all, sweetheart wear your wedding bands if you want to. That band is a symbol of a bond and a one in flesh with your husband and the love you have for each other. Second of all, Jesus symbol and covenant with us was His blood. His blood shows us that he died for us and our sins. We wear His blood over us daily and because of His blood we are free from sin, sickness, poverty, depression, etc. Thirdly, you can't live for your pastor, the first lady or any other human beliefs because what you do for Christ, not man but Christ, will last. That's why you have the Bible because it is the blueprint of your life. Next time ask God for guidance and let Him be the foundation of your marriage not man. Rely on God and His word. I wish you the best.
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Unregistered(d) |
Re:weddingband | ||
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My husband is an apostolic minister, my father is a pastor they both minister in the same church...I am struggling with this issue... I'm born and raised in this
" doctrine" I don't think that this should even be an issue... a wedding band does not effect your salvation either way... as for the response about pagan origin...there are alot of things we do that may have a pagan origin that we do not know about... in the bible and ancient times when a king gave you his ring it was a sign of authority being given...marriage is the first ordained institution...a ring honors a commitment(vow) between a man and woman...a public symbol of a private commitment...like baptism. I want to wear a wedding band but I do not want to cause division...I welcome some any insight ...thank you |
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Unregistered(d) |
First-century Christians wore rings | ||
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Hi there!
I don't post here too often, but I would to add a few comments concerning the "rings" and particularly the use of "gold", as in wedding rings. First of all, I study biblical archaeology, and I try to stay current on all the digs and have spent time digging in Israel. I think that all of you ladies need to be aware of a few things concerning the first-century Christians. One way of identifying when a tomb is opened that it is Christian, is the presence of jewelry. A Jewish tomb will not have any type of jewelry. A Christian tomb will, not always, but usually. There are plenty of first-century evidences that Christian women were buried with "crosses" and they were wearing rings. I am aware of excavations in 2002 which were Christians tombs that included two specific rings, one of Christ, and one of the mother and child depicted on the face of the ring. Those tombs were from the 614 AD invasion of the Persias in Israel. So, if you want to be a "first-century" Christian women, there should be no problem with wearing wedding rings. Second.. let's address the passage concerning the "gold". The usual passage which is used to determine whether a wedding ring is to be worn is 1Ti 2:9 (KJV) In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; but I want to reference another translation for clarity, and I will explain... 1Ti 2:9 (NAS) Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, The context of the passage as explained to me in my Greek classes is that the text should read more similarily to... not with braided hair and gold or not with braided hair and pearls, or with costly clothing. referencing the adornation of the hair and not the use of gold in rings. That would be the explaination of William Mounce, "Greek for the Rest of Us", copyright 2003 Zondervan. He teaches Greek in seminary. I hope this helps in anyone's decision concerning the use of jewelry. I personally do no wear any jewelry except one necklace which is a remembrance from someone special to me, and I wear it 24/7. I don't care if it shows publicly, or if it is under my clothing... as I don't wear it for appearance. ~serapha~ |
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bygracesaved |
Re: Re:weddingband | ||
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I have been married for 35 years in the ACC. I have worn a wedding ring for the past five years, as I was convicted to do so because I work in the corporate world and it is so much better to let people know up front that I am married. When I began wearing one, I had a few people say to me, "I always thought you didn't wear a ring because you didn't want anyone to know you were married". Even though I always bring my husband into the conversation when talking about home, etc., with others at work, some people out there just do no think anyone who is married would not wear a ring to show it. It has been a very positive thing for me as I do not have to deal with people thinking I am single. And if men will flirt with older women in the work world, then surely it is even more difficult for the younger women. Some of my ACC good friends (members too) also wear wedding rings in the work force. It clarifies our standing to others with whom we work. I do not feel it changes me in any way. My parents (also members of ACC) were also supporters of the wearing of wedding rings, but didn't ever really do so. The issue of wearing a ring or not is irrelavant to salvation.
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Unregistered(d) |
Re:weddingband | ||
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Hello Bygracesaved,
You made the point that, "It has been a very positive thing for me as I do not have to deal with people thinking I am single. And if men will flirt with older women in the work world, then surely it is even more difficult for the younger women." Single sisters are as unavailable to their male co-workers as married ones, no? What would you suggest single sisters wear to prevent men in the work world from flirting with them? |
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bygracesaved |
Re: Re:weddingband | ||
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Being married, you want the world to know it. If you are single, that is another issue. You are not making a statement that you are married, but you must find a way to show that you are not interested in dating. That you must find a way to project yourself. But for a married woman in the corporate world today, a wedding ring shows men you work with "hands off" and most men honor that. If you are single, then you have another issue. Do not conflict these issues. They are separate.
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